Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part Eight

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“You know our love was meant to be. The kind of love that lasts forever. And I want you here with me. From tonight until the end of time.” ~ Chicago 

Hearing Mr. Perfect’s  voice on the other end of the phone over 1,000 miles away was something I never thought I would hear. I was surprised. Here I was about to get married and my Ex-Fiancé, the love of my life calls me up out of no where. He was sweet and kind like he always was. He was still… perfect. I was no longer worthy of a man like him. I told him I was getting married and we chatted for a little while. I told him NOTHING about what had happened to me after we had broken up. I couldn’t tell him how badly I had needed him to come rescue me. I couldn’t tell him that I had been so heartbroken over losing him that I had dated a horrible man (Mr. Godfather). I couldn’t tell him how that man had taken the most valuable part of me, that part of me that should have been given to Mr. Perfect on our wedding night had we gotten married. I couldn’t tell him the sick things Mr. Godfather  had forced me to do. I couldn’t tell him that I had been abused so badly, I had almost lost my life. No, I could never speak of any of these things to him. Not ever. Perhaps I knew I wasn’t worthy of a perfect man like him and that I should hang up the phone. I have no idea why he called me. I only know that I was no longer the girl he once knew and that I would never love another man the way I loved him. 

“There are things that we never want to let go of, people we never want to leave behind. But keep in mind that letting go isn’t the end of the world, it’s the beginning of a new life.”    

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The night of my wedding to Mr. Bodyguard, I was so excited. Nothing my abusive Ex had made me do would ruin this for me. I was ready to give myself to a man who had earned my trust, my respect, and my heart. I took my shower and prepared for our wedding night. I wanted everything to be perfect. I can still remember the drive to the Church. I don’t really remember anything my parents talked about. I do remember feeling happy knowing I was about to be Mr. Bodyguard’s wife. I can even remember how the pantie hose I was wearing under my dress pants felt and how I could hardly wait to put my white wedding dress on. I felt so clean. I had the chance to do something right and holy before God.

“And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful.” ~ Revelation 21:5

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Photo by Jorge Rosal on Unsplash

The night air was crisp and the night sky was beautiful. It was perfect. I took my things to the ladies room and finished getting ready. I got dressed and did everything pretty much by myself. I have no idea where my mother (my matron of honor) was that whole time. It didn’t matter though, I was marrying the man I loved… my “Knight in shining armor”. I waited in the ladies room as everyone arrived at the Church. We had planned a small intimate wedding and I was ready. There was just one problem, the groom was missing. 

As I waited there in my wedding dress for Mr. Bodyguard (my Fiancé) to arrive, I began to get nervous. No one knew where he was. He was LATE. As far as I knew, he would have gotten ready at his apartment and be driving himself to the Church in that  gorgeous Camaro of his. Did he change his mind? Where on earth could he be? Finally, I heard, “He’s here.” and I breathed a sigh of relief. I held my beautiful bouquet that my grandmother had made for me and I took my father’s arm as he walked me down the aisle. I saw my groom. He was so handsome. His father (his best man) was standing beside him and smiling. His father was the one who insisted he meet me. I am eternally grateful to him for thinking I was worthy of his son and loving me like a daughter. My father preformed the ceremony and we took pictures afterwards. We had a little reception with the beautiful cake I had chosen. I honestly do not know if my groom even cared about the cake, the handmade mints, the monogrammed napkins or the tiny ribbon tied scroll keepsakes for our guest. As long as he had me, he didn’t need anything else. I didn’t see that at the time. We had been through a lot and we didn’t need or want to deal with any more drama from certain family members. He and I just wanted to get married and make a life together. After we had visited with our guests, we were ready to get out of there. We climbed into his Camaro and took off down the highway. When we had to stop at a red light to turn, my Husband ran the red light and we both laughed. He must have been in a hurry to get me home! 

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We didn’t plan a long honeymoon or go on a trip. He had his main job with the security company and we were both working for my parents in their business. We worked so much that we decided to just go to his apartment and spend our honeymoon there. When we got out of the car to go inside, he picked me up to carry me and my veil (my mother’s wedding veil) fell off and landed on the cold pavement. After everything that had happened with the cabin incident, it was kinda funny. After he took me inside, I went to the bathroom to change into something more appropriate. The lingerie I had chosen for my first night with him as husband and wife was stunning. It was pure white. I walked towards the bedroom where my husband was waiting for me and I stood in the doorway. When he saw me, he was very pleased (to this day he has never forgotten that moment and what I was wearing). After all of the abuse I had endured, I would finally know what it felt like to have a man love me in EVERY way. I could love him in return and finally know what it was like to make actual love to a man. I gave myself completely to him that night and he showed me how a real man treats the woman he loves. He was worth EVERYTHING I had been through to get to this moment. Our wedding night was perfect and beyond beautiful.

If only I had known that the past would continue to haunt both of us and the coping mechanisms would only get worse…

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(Our Wedding song) ❤

You’re The Inspiration
“You know our love was meant to be
The kind of love that lasts forever
And I want you here with me
From tonight until the end of time

You should know,
Everywhere I go
Always on my mind,
In my heart
In my soul

Baby

You’re the meaning in my life
You’re the inspiration
You bring feeling to my life
You’re the inspiration
Wanna have you near me
I wanna have you hear me sayin’
No one needs you more than I need you

And I know, yes I know that it’s plain to see
We’re so in love when we’re together
Now I know that I need you here with me
From tonight until the end of time

You should know,
Everywhere I go
Always on my mind,
You’re in my heart
In my soul”

~ Chicago 

 

*My thoughts, my feelings, my story and my opinions are my own. I don’t want to cause any trouble for my family members who are preachers and the ministries they have built. I love and respect them. It is not my desire to hurt anyone or the images they have made for themselves. That being said, I am not above or beneath anyone and I have a right to share my story just like anyone else.

 

Amazed By His Grace, 

Purple Rose

 

Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part Nine

Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part Seven

Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part Six

Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part Five

Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part Four (He returns)

Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part Three

Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part Two

Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part One

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15 thoughts on “Mr. Bodyguard ~ Part Eight

  1. Stuart L. Tutt says:

    I’m in tears. So beautiful! And this…
    “I gave myself completely to him that night and he showed me how a real man treats the woman he loves.”

    Oh the memories of my love of a lifetime and the life I wish we could have had.

    Liked by 2 people

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